Little Bit Of Harmless Fun.

A sailor meets a pirate in a bar, and talk turns to their adventures.
The sailor notes that the pirate has a peg leg, a hook hand, and an eye patch.

"How did you end up with a peg leg?" he asks.

"I was swept overboard into a school of sharks," the pirate replies.
"As my men were pulling me out, a shark bit off my leg."

"Wow!" cries the sailor. "What about your hook?"

"Argh! An enemy hacked off my hand during a raid."

"Incredible! How'd you get the eye patch?"

"A seagull shit in my eye."

"You lost your eye to a sea gull dropping?"

"Well," says the pirate, "it was my first day with the hook."